I am so epically tired it's not even funny. Our last appointment went just fine, both babies are wonderful, amniotic fluid is great, and my placenta previa looks like it's going to clear itself up. Thank goodness! I've been feeling a lot of movement from Twin B today, and I've even been graced with a few little flutters from Twin A as well!
We were unable to tell the genders this time, because they both had their butts turned towards the front with their legs tucked around their stomachs. Little monkey's! Oh, Twin B has also changed his position. They were head to toe in a ying yang pose, but now Twin B has his head resting on Twin A's stomach. It's awfully cute in the pictures, which I will post, as soon as I figure out how to transfer the pictures from our PC to my Mac. We got a really nice one of Twin A's hand, it looks like she was waving at us!
Well, so far my sister in law is an hour late. She's supposed to be coming over to help me sort through laundry and get rid of the excess stuff, but so far, no show. Which is sad, because I think I'm just going to pass out and sleep the rest of the day away. After I eat a tuna sandwich and some ritz crackers...
Twin pregnancies, more so than singletons, are measured in milestones. You know how in every pregnancy (twin or not) everyone anxiously awaits that magical 12 week/first trimester-is-over time? Well, with twins, 12 weeks is great, but there are several other milestones we must reach before we can breathe easy.
Milestone #1: 20 weeks-
While the 12 week mark, the end of the first trimester (and hopefully morning sickness!), for a singleton decreases the odds of miscarrying by a whole heck of a lot, for twins it's different. The risk of miscarrying (also called Vanishing Twin Syndrome) doesn't truly decrease until about 20 weeks. And while the odds of one twin vanishing decrease, surprisingly enough, the odds of having a still birth with one, or both, twins never truly decrease. (Scary thought, huh?) I have yet to find a concrete answer on why this is, but the general thought is that there is much more stress on the mothers body and on the babies during a twin pregnancy, increasing the risk of complications. Although there is a very happy part of this milestone! If you have not yet found out the genders of your little peas, now is the perfect time to do it. There is still enough womb (hehe I made a joke!) in there for, uh, things, to be accessible to the ultrasound technician, and everything is fully developed, so there is less of a chance of your tech getting it wrong.
While the 12 week mark, the end of the first trimester (and hopefully morning sickness!), for a singleton decreases the odds of miscarrying by a whole heck of a lot, for twins it's different. The risk of miscarrying (also called Vanishing Twin Syndrome) doesn't truly decrease until about 20 weeks. And while the odds of one twin vanishing decrease, surprisingly enough, the odds of having a still birth with one, or both, twins never truly decrease. (Scary thought, huh?) I have yet to find a concrete answer on why this is, but the general thought is that there is much more stress on the mothers body and on the babies during a twin pregnancy, increasing the risk of complications. Although there is a very happy part of this milestone! If you have not yet found out the genders of your little peas, now is the perfect time to do it. There is still enough womb (hehe I made a joke!) in there for, uh, things, to be accessible to the ultrasound technician, and everything is fully developed, so there is less of a chance of your tech getting it wrong.
Milestone #2: 24 weeks-
No one wants you to deliver as early as 24 weeks, but the reality is that at 24 weeks, your babies have an 80% chance of survival if they were to be born now, barring infections or other complications. It's called the "threshold of viability." Would they have extensive NICU time? Definitely. Typically, premature babies live in the NICU until their due date…so in this case, 3 months of NICU time, or more depending on any complications. Would there be lifelong mental/physical issues? Probably. But, they would more than likely live…even if they weighed only about 1.5 pounds a piece at birth.
No one wants you to deliver as early as 24 weeks, but the reality is that at 24 weeks, your babies have an 80% chance of survival if they were to be born now, barring infections or other complications. It's called the "threshold of viability." Would they have extensive NICU time? Definitely. Typically, premature babies live in the NICU until their due date…so in this case, 3 months of NICU time, or more depending on any complications. Would there be lifelong mental/physical issues? Probably. But, they would more than likely live…even if they weighed only about 1.5 pounds a piece at birth.
Milestone #3: 28 weeks-
Again, no one wants you to have a baby that soon, but your chances of survival jump to 95% at that point. Lasting mental and physical abnormalities due to prematurity also drop in probability. They may have learning disabilities, but maybe not. Most twins, regardless of when they are born, are generally late in developmental things, in all areas, but they usually catch up by their second birthday. Even with this rough start, the babies will spend a month or two in the NICU, but if they are breathing well unassisted, eating and growing, they may go home with you sooner than expected.
Again, no one wants you to have a baby that soon, but your chances of survival jump to 95% at that point. Lasting mental and physical abnormalities due to prematurity also drop in probability. They may have learning disabilities, but maybe not. Most twins, regardless of when they are born, are generally late in developmental things, in all areas, but they usually catch up by their second birthday. Even with this rough start, the babies will spend a month or two in the NICU, but if they are breathing well unassisted, eating and growing, they may go home with you sooner than expected.
Milestone #4: 34 weeks-
If you make it to 34 weeks, your entire medical team, and there are LOTS of people behind you in your pregnancy, breaths a sigh of relief, while remaining cautiously optimistic. At this point, your babies could be delivered and may spend only a week or even a few days, in the NICU (again, depending on their breathing and eating abilities). Just as an aside, sometimes one twin is discharged while the other is not. This is not uncommon, since more often than not, one twin weighs more than the other and has a better grasp on breathing and eating on their own.
If you make it to 34 weeks, your entire medical team, and there are LOTS of people behind you in your pregnancy, breaths a sigh of relief, while remaining cautiously optimistic. At this point, your babies could be delivered and may spend only a week or even a few days, in the NICU (again, depending on their breathing and eating abilities). Just as an aside, sometimes one twin is discharged while the other is not. This is not uncommon, since more often than not, one twin weighs more than the other and has a better grasp on breathing and eating on their own.
Milestone #5: 37 weeks-
37 weeks is considered full term for twins, unlike the 40 weeks for a singleton baby. That's because twins develop, on average, two weeks ahead of their singleton counter parts until about 34 weeks gestation, and by that point, their growth slows down. So at full term, 37 weeks, twins weigh between 4 and 5 pounds each. (Although I have read about twins weighing 7 pounds a piece! That's the average size of a singleton newborn!) If you are lucky enough to deliver now, your twins will probably only receive basic NICU time, and more than likely be discharged at the same time as you are from the hospital.
37 weeks is considered full term for twins, unlike the 40 weeks for a singleton baby. That's because twins develop, on average, two weeks ahead of their singleton counter parts until about 34 weeks gestation, and by that point, their growth slows down. So at full term, 37 weeks, twins weigh between 4 and 5 pounds each. (Although I have read about twins weighing 7 pounds a piece! That's the average size of a singleton newborn!) If you are lucky enough to deliver now, your twins will probably only receive basic NICU time, and more than likely be discharged at the same time as you are from the hospital.
So far, I haven't hit any of these milestones, since I'm only 16 weeks along, but every day I get a little closer to that first milestone. Every day I get a little closer to holding my sweet babies in my arms. Every little kick they give me sends me soaring up to cloud nine, and I know that they are there and one day I will meet them.
I have 6 days, (next Wednesday) until my next ultrasound appointment with my Dr., and hopefully we will able to determine what sexes they are! Hopefully they hold still long enough :) The last ultrasound we had, Twin B wouldn't hold still and made it very difficult for her to get a lock on his heartbeat.
And yes, I said his. While we don't have proof yet of what they are, my mothers intuition (and I'll admit it, my hope) says Twin A is a girl and Twin B is a boy. I don't know why I think that, I just do. I unconsciously refer to each of them as a boy or girl, and while I may be proved wrong in just under a week, I do hope I'm right.
Because really, if I don't give Chris a son, I think he'd go nuts having to deal with FOUR girls ^^ Well, that may actually be entertaining... :D
I am now into my 15th week, both babes are doing fantastic with heart beats coming in at 153(B) and 166(A). We have an ultrasound scheduled for the end of the month, exactly two weeks from today, the 21st of September. This ultrasound, hopefully, will be the one where we find out the genders! I can't wait for that moment, but I'm also very very anxious about it.
Now, no judging me here, because this is just my own opinion and I'm fully aware that a lot of people don't hold my same viewpoint. But, I am terrified of having two boys. To be completely honest, I don't even want one. I really don't need to explain why, but the big bullet points are things like: More destructive, more aggressive, more prone to breaking themselves (bones and the like), more stubborn, harder to potty train, and need I mention the whole peeing in your face thing? Gross.
I have gathered this information first hand. I started babysitting when I was 12, and every single boy that I have had to babysit, with or without siblings, have been utter terrors. I can't chalk it all up to parenting, because some of the boys I have babysat have had female siblings, even younger ones, who would rather sit and play dollies than try to climb the bookshelf and pop off the barbies heads. Now, one of my best friends has babysat a lot of boys and has told me that the ones she has had were fantastic and not at all demons, so I know that there are "good" boys out there... I just don't even want to chance it.
Plus, when you take into account that my husband has 7 siblings, 5 of them male... I think we have enough boys there already. I have taken into account the fact that while he doesn't REALLY want a boy, I'm of the opinion that all fathers need a son. I don't care how tomboy the girls are, it's just not the same as having a son. Not that Chris is overly athletic or into sports or anything that our daughter Felicity couldn't do (I think she will be besting him at video games by the time she's five), but it's just the little light I see in his eyes when he thinks about us having a son.
So I've come to terms with having one boy, especially since my intuition tells me we are, but I really don't think I could physically, or emotionally handle two. Maybe sequentially, but not together. When I've told people, after being asked what Chris and I "want", that I will take anything that isn't two boys, I get the question "Well what about two girls?" I just have to look at them like, what about it? Are you kidding? I would love to have two girls! Especially if they are anything like my darling Felicity. Oh yeah, when she's mad the devil runs for cover, but she is the sweetest, smartest, and most incredible little being I've ever met. No bias on that comment either ^^
It is, perhaps, the single reason that I am going to find out the genders of my twins. Because I DO have a preference. If that sounds bad to you, imagine my guilt. I already love these little monkey's more than I can say, and I feel awful to think that I will be disappointed come the 21st. I have been reading a lot about gender disappointment, and while I didn't think it was that big of a deal, it's one of the top contributing factors in postpartum depression. I already went through a mild case of that with Felicity. Mainly because we had trouble breastfeeding which made me feel like a bad mother. I was able to pump and feed her through a bottle, so she was getting the "good stuff" from me, but it wasn't the same as being able to supply that milk for her without the use of a pump and bottle.
And to be honest, I would rather be disappointed at an ultrasound than at the birth of my children. If we find out that we are having twin boys this month, it gives me time to get used to the idea, grieve over the loss of the dreams and ideas I had about a boy/girl pair, and move on. But if I were to wait until the day they were born, and then find out it was two boys... I don't think I would be very motivated to do anything. I'd be depressed, mopey, and I may not feel that drive to do absolutely everything for them. Now that is a bad thought.
So in two weeks, we will find out. And in 8ish weeks, I will have a fantastic baby shower, thrown by my awesome friend Gemma. And sometime in January or February, our little peas will arrive!
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